Featured in the RNE Magazine, 2021 Volume 2
By Megan Hanson
When I spoke to the team at Resolve New England about this piece, we agreed I should tell the personal side of my story rather than the story of my organization, Recurrent Pregnancy Loss Association (RPLA). But when I put pen to paper, I found myself at a loss, figuratively and literally. My emotional experience has been vast. It was hard to determine which parts to share when all parts felt vitally important.
My husband and I have miscarried six times.
The journey has been at times physically painful, psychologically traumatic, financially burdensome, and stressful to my relationships. I’ve had multiple surgeries, taken hormones, steroids, blood thinners, vitamins, and supplements, and done two rounds of IVF. I’ve intermittently cut out dairy, gluten, coffee, and sugar. I’ve done yoga. I’ve prayed desperately.
I’ve had nausea and night-sweats and sore boobs and exhaustion. I’ve been pregnant a combined total of 45 weeks – that’s more than full term. We’ve seen two heartbeats. But we’ve never made it through the first trimester. It’s hard to talk about. Which is why many women don’t.