Guest post by a member of the AllPaths community
Twenty-one years ago, I was conceived through in vitro fertilization (IVF). Today, I am a sophomore in college studying biology and neuroscience, with hopes of someday becoming a doctor. During my time in between, I’ve danced my heart out, learned some valuable life lessons, watched my three little sisters grow up, and so much more.
Growing up, my understanding of IVF has evolved a number of times. For example, during recess in fifth grade, my best friend informed me–with very little detail or understanding–that I was created differently. I don’t think either of us understood what that entailed, and I spent the next few days convinced that my dad wasn’t actually my dad. Soon after, my parents explained the basics of IVF to me, and I gained a far more comprehensive, accurate understanding of my conception.
Still, it wasn’t until years later that I would come to appreciate the time, effort, money, tears, and hope that my parents poured into their three-year infertility journey before becoming pregnant with me.
My dad, who attended twelve years of Catholic school, worked through religious and moral tension surrounding IVF. His concern was that IVF felt a bit like “playing God” and he sought the advice and counsel of a priest. He blessed my parents pursuing this route as their intent was pure and they had exhausted all other methods for conceiving me. The priest expressed his personal belief that God had assisted scientists and researchers with developing these techniques, similar to how they have helped others extend lives with other medical procedures such as heart and brain surgeries.
I also recognize the countless appointments, needles, and emotional rollercoasters they faced during their journey. My mom endured seven IVF cycles before conceiving me and an additional six cycles for my three sisters. My dad also had to undergo procedures to be able to extract his sperm due to his diagnosis of congenital bilateral absence of the vas deferens (CBAVD), which caused my parents’ infertility challenges.
Through their struggles and challenges, my parents became involved with AllPaths Family Building (back when it was known as RESOLVE of the Bay State), where they actively participated in the peer groups and conferences. They have been very open to helping others on a similar journey by speaking and writing. My dad was also a board member for a few years, and my parents continued to stay involved and donate after they had completed our family.
As we grew, my parents introduced the AllPaths community to me and my sisters, and we started volunteering. Attending my first AllPaths Walk and listening to several emotional stories opened my eyes to others’ fertility struggles, and helped me grasp the power of IVF. Over the years and after taking several biology courses, I also better understand the science behind IVF. Now, I am appreciative and intrigued by the science and medicine that makes IVF possible.
Recently, I was lucky enough to speak with the Boston IVF doctor who made my life possible. On my computer screen, I finally saw the person who turned my parents’ despair into hope, allowed me to be conceived against all odds, and gave me my three little sisters. Seeing and speaking with him during our Zoom meeting was a surreal experience, and he also expressed his feelings of gratification in seeing his work come full circle.
Twenty-one years ago, I was conceived through IVF. Today, I am motivated to pursue a career in medicine, inspired by the journey that brought me into this world. I hope to contribute to the world of medicine and help other individuals and families.